Glassy Eyed

Either I've picked up a cold, or spring allergies are upon us. I'm voting for the second possibility because I like how it sounds. It's been a beautiful week with all the seasons sprinkled in. This is April.

I met an old friend for breakfast this morning. I can't recall a day when her name was not familiar. We don't catch up often but will sit for hours when we do. She is a lifelong friend who still dreams that one day we will find out we're actually related even though our DNA tests say otherwise. Either way we both grew up with platinum blond hair and blue eyes, and deep in her heart she always wished it to be so. 

Our conversations today led us to talk of family, genetics, secrets and adoption. She showed me pictures of her bio family; her mother who doesn't want to meet her, the brother who doesn't know she exists, the father who died before she could discover him (she was his only child), the uncle who was thrilled to be found, and a variety of grandparents. My heart aches that her discoveries didn't provide a better sense of relief and belonging... She is as gorgeous today as she was in high school but her eyes are sad, her heart is broken, and I can't fix that for her.

I found myself down by the lake again this afternoon before the cold front swept in, the temperatures plummeted, and the rain began to fall. The waves were gentle today and by some stroke of luck I kept both feet dry. I had no intention of scouring the shore for bits of polished glass and yet came home with a fabulous little collection. (My kids will curse and throw them all back into the lake when I'm dead and gone. LOL!) It's a pointless passion, a worthless obsession, and yet I find a small token of satisfaction in picking the tiny gems from the stones.