Back to the Lake

 I took my camera down to the lake again yesterday...

Ever changing and always beautiful.

It's Not a Job, It's a Party!

 Did I tell you things are not running as usual at work? We're slightly short staffed and I've been reassigned for the week, and maybe next week as well. My boss (she's the site director) is doing the cooking this week. I've become an assistant teacher instead. I was in the infant room on Monday, but yesterday and today I spent the better part of the day with some of my favorite toddlers, and then the last couple hours of the day in the infant room.

 This morning we played outside for a bit. The snow is thick and icy. And it's melting. After about 45 minutes (maybe it was 30...) the kiddos were tired and cold, and their mittens were wet. I couldn't resist snapping a cell phone picture of this little sweetheart who climbed up on the the Little Tikes truck for a rest. (I can post the picture if she's not looking at the camera, right?

My Little Brain

The meme said- "Many people think the grass is greener somewhere else but the grass is green where you water it. Remember that."

 Me- "I can't even see the grass."

Friend- "That's because of the snow."

 Me- 🤔 

Friend- "The grass is there, just keep watering."

Me- "Right now I'm just going to wait for the snow to melt."

I am way too easily amused, especially when there are metaphors involved.

Perfect Day

 My sister and I met up with a childhood friend this afternoon at Webster Park. We hadn't seen him in several years so it was nice to catch up.

 

 

It was a gorgeous day! (Yup, I still love the lake.)

I Don't Blog Much Anymore

 I don't blog much anymore, but our baby went home Friday and that is pretty incredible. Totally blog worthy! I popped in to visit for a spell late this morning and a little into the afternoon.

He was looking chipper, crawling about, and even practiced a bit of free-standing.

I took him a stuffed doggie that I picked up at Walmart mid-week on a lunch break. This morning I hunted down some wide-eyed needles and a bit of black yarn, and I stitched a zipper scar on that puppy's chest.

It was a beautiful, snowy day. Colder than cold. Typical February in upstate NY.

Oh, My Heart!

 A week ago my little grandson had heart surgery. He was born in April with two holes in his heart, and although the doctors were hoping they would close up on their own, they did not. As scary as having the surgery was, not doing it was more frightening.

Henry was a champ and the surgery went perfectly. The trouble cam when he was being weaned off the sedative. Apparently one of the rare side affects of this particular sedative is seizures. Thankfully, his watchful mom noticed and alerted the doctors.

It's been quite the week for Bethany's family. Not only has Henry been away, but Bethany has been away with him the majority of the time. (I've encouraged her to be there for Henry, just like she would for any of the others should they have to be hospitalized.) Adam has been holding things together at home and I'm sure has a renewed appreciation for all Beth does around the house. 

Henry is sporting a great new souvenir; a fantastic zipper scar! He looks just like a stuffed doll now, only much cuter. 

Today he's feeling good. Good enough to pull himself to a standing position. Just look at that smile! He'll be going home in no time. This picture makes my heart happy.

It's Valentines Day

 Valentines Day.  It's a tough day to spend alone.

The early morning bathroom call came at 4 am. I crawled back into bed immediately after and tried to sleep, but thoughts of my pottery shelf invaded my mind, clutched my heart, and left a knot in my stomach. Yup, it's that bad... *deep breath* Needless to say, I had a hard time getting back to sleep and when I finally opened my eyes in the morning, I found myself a little short of time to get ready for church. I made it there for worship, but just barely. 

I've been on my own long enough to know there are certain days of the year when I need a distraction. Last Tuesday I sent a message to my friend Laura. "Are you busy on Valentine's Day? I was wondering if you might want to get breakfast together," and she agreed. (I love her!) So on this very chilly Valentines Day, we met at the Coal Tower Restaurant for breakfast. It's so good to have friends.

Stuff, Just Stuff

Emotional. Not sure if it's because I've drastically reduced my carb and sugar intake, the lack of sunshine, or something else weighing on my heart and mind. There are certainly a number of things it could be...

Tomorrow morning I will rise early and head off to Bethany's house like I did in November when she was sick in the hospital, but this time she is not sick. Our sweet Henry is scheduled for surgery tomorrow morning and I will go to stay with my other grandchildren while Beth and Adam are together at the hospital waiting for Henry. (Prayers are appreciated.) I haven't been to Bethany's house since Christmas and am feeling a little out of the loop.

I'm also grieving the loss of my shelf at the pottery studio, even though I haven't been there enough to warrant paying the rental fee. This tells me I will be back in the studio one day, and probably not too very long from now. 

Sunday is Valentine's Day. This could throw me off a tad too, so I just connected with a friend and we have plans to meet for breakfast after church. I feel better already! Ha ha!

I'll Always Love You, Clay

 I broke up with Clay. Turned my pottery studio key in today. It was a sad day. In actuality, it's been a tough week. I'm feeling off emotionally,perhaps partially due to a change in eating habits. Here's hoping my moods level back off at settled like they usually are. I'm tired of feeling cranky even if it does give ample opportunity to act pleasant in spite of how I feel under the surface. I'm hoping to take another class when, and if, things ever really open up and relax again. In the meantime, I'll have an extra $75 a month to drop into my savings account.

A Loud Silence

It's been five and a half years since the pieces clicked into place and my life fell apart. (Yes, I do know that sounds like two opposite things, but it happened simultaneously.) It's taken this long for me to realize that complete silence doesn't help anyone, myself included. So I posted a meme on Facebook and got a little flack. 

One friend said, "This type of public outing is one of the problems with Facebook - very sad..." and another couple agreed. 

Thankfully, many others were supportive, with the biggest supporter saying, "How about if you don’t like the post then keep scrolling and keep your uninformed opinion to yourself. Because I am sure in order to make these kinds of comments that you are gravely uninformed on the situation."

Our situation, though heartbreaking, is far too common. It is the silence surrounding it that is most damaging. And it's not as though I put all my cards on the table... The most interesting thing to me about the reactions is that the meme is all about me with only a somewhat vague reference to the actions of the other individual. It really could have referred to any number of things. *sigh*

Sadly, there are repercussions to abuse and one of them is that the secrets won’t be silent forever. And that is almost as frightening to me as anyone.