The Tulip

If you are not familiar with The Tulip Tale, you can find some background here. (The first post is from last year and will help you understand where I'm going with today's story.)

I haven't felt the same heaviness this year, but I did find myself thinking of her this past week, my beautiful salmon colored tulip. She not only survived despite the odds against her, but she was the prettiest tulip I have ever seen. She taught me about life, survival, and God's amazing ability to heal. I caught myself glancing across the yard last week, knowing I wouldn't find her yet hopeful just the same, but she was not there. She is gone now, never to return, her purpose in life complete, and yet the lessons remain.

I almost didn't go to church this morning. I know how that sounds being Easter and all, but I haven't been the last two Sundays (I was in Florida) and sometimes it's hard to go to church alone, especially on a Sunday so geared toward families. It can accentuate the loneliness of being singular, especially in a group of people I don't really know. In the end I decided to go anyway, because I knew I'd regret staying home. Diana greeted me in the sanctuary and invited me to sit with her and God provided the gift of not being entirely alone.

There was a children's moment during the service where a woman invited the children forward and she read them a book, Good News by Glenys Nellist. I smiled when on the first page there appeared a tulip praising God. There she was, my beautiful tulip, smiling at me from within a board book. "I once was lost in darkness, but now the sun I've found!"  The voice of God whispered in my ear and I knew He heard the unspoken cry of my heart. I smiled silently.

A woman gave the Easter message as is the custom of this new fellowship I've been attending. It was the women who followed Jesus and attended to His needs who were the first to proclaim the risen Christ and so a woman is given place to share the Good News on Easter morning. She delivered a beautiful message of God's love.

After the message and sharing of the Lord's Table came two final songs, words on the screen above so we could follow along. The last song, Beautiful Things, had a picture of beautiful, red tulips blooming in the background. If I ever needed confirmation of the Father's love for me, and my lost tulip being an unmistakable gift of His love... And to think I almost stayed home. I left with tears in my eyes.

Bits and Pieces

 Every so often I let a bigger chunk of time go by than I intended. 

* On Friday, March 22 we finished up my Disney Birthday Adventure by visiting Animal Kingdom with Jim and Michele's two youngest children, Jonah and Charlie. It was was an absolutely incredible week topped off with a birthday cake on Saturday afternoon. I couldn't have asked for  more and am so grateful for the lengths they went to in order to make the week so incredibly special.

Jim and I visited Gideon's Bakehouse inside the West End Market on Corrine Drive in Orlando on the way to the airport Sunday at noon. We had Parker along for the ride. I bought a few of their spectacular cookies to take home, and then wandered about the Orlando airport picking up a few souvenirs there that I hadn't found or missed in the parks at Disney. It was a direct flight home so no layovers this time.

* Monday morning found me visiting the cardiologist before work. This was scheduled ahead of time and my first visit. I'm now scheduled for an echocardiogram in June along with another blood pressure medication and a return visit to the cardiologist. (Turning 60 is an exciting adventure so far!) It's good to know I wasn't simply anxious or crazy when I made the appointment in February because I was feeling off.

* There was a mandatory in-service staff meeting after work from 6-8 pm on Tuesday evening that covered all things related to recent visits from OCFS and CPS. The case involving our classroom is not yet settled (it should be halfway there now) but we have been assured by the director that all will be good in the end and no one is in danger of losing their jobs. In the meantime, my co worker and I remain separated and work is stressful, albeit a bit friendlier. I was so tired after work on Wednesday that I put myself to bed by about 7:30 pm.

* Some news of interest. You may have heard about the up and coming total solar eclipse that will be occurring on April 8. Rochester, NY is in the path of totality which makes it a pretty big deal around here. Schools and business will be closed and we are expecting a record number of visitors to our area. That in and of itself is pretty exciting, but there is an added excitement I did not know of until accidentally stumbling upon a news article while in Florida last week. (Here's another in case the first doesn't work.) Back in 1978 a 22 year old local teacher, in his first year of teaching Earth Science, was looking 46 years into the future and inviting his 14 year old students to gather together for this very event. 

Fun Fact #1- the event is on the horizon. 

Fun fact #2- I was one of those students 

Lester Holt and his NBC news team are flying into Rochester to interview Mr. Moriarty and some of his former students! It's almost bigger news for some of us than the eclipse. LOL!

Wildly Wonderful!

 I flew into Orlando on Saturday, March 16.

Sunday, March 17- Jim and I took a walk at Black Bear Wilderness Area in Sanford where I saw my first in the wild alligator.

Monday, March 18- Jim and Michele took me to Disney World! It was fantastically fun! I loved all of it!!!

Tuesday, March 19- We stuck close to home and met up with my long lost brother in law and his wife at Hollerbach's German Restaurant in downtown Sanford. It was Jim's first time meeting Uncle Stan.After lunch Jim got a haircut across the street and we walked the 3 miles back home. 

Wednesday, March 20- Jim and I went to Epcot together. It was fabulous! We ate our way around the world, checked out all the gift shops, and enjoyed a myriad of rides through various countries. Guardians of the Galaxy is the best ride ever. I think I dreamed of it in childhood.

Thursday, March 21 (today)- I got up at 5:15 am, drove to the coast and met my friend Marty for sunrise and breakfast on the beach. 

Back home in Sanford, we were surprised by a visit from Jim's friend Dan and his wife Rachel.

And then we watched a rocket launch from the driveway.

What an amazing week!

Sprawling

Sometimes life runs up behind and slams into your back like an unexpected toddler, threatening to send you sprawling, not because they are so big and tough, but simply because you didn't see them coming.

Plans

In one week I will be back in Florida. I've never been to Florida in March. I have been in December, I have been in July, and I have been in the very end of August when the hot, summer air blew off the land, laughing and threatening to cook us alive. I don't expect March to be quite as hot as August.

This last week was a challenge. Toddler 2 is a little different than Toddler 1 even though we often trade a child or two and the rooms are separated by a half door. The children in Toddler 1 are slightly older, more vicious, and very loud and boisterous. Also, they don't listen. Mostly because they don't have to. 

I have two doctor's appointments this week, one on Monday morning and the other Tuesday afternoon. I also have a hair appointment on Tuesday afternoon. Somewhere between now and Wednesday evening I will begin to pack my bags. I'm flying into Orlando again, but not so early in the morning. I'm just a little excited.

Investigation: The Abridged Version

Punishments can be punitive.

Did you ever find yourself in the middle of a family feud, except you and a member of the other clan were besties? Ever been told you can't play with your best friend or hang out together because the "adults" involved weren't getting along? That happened to me when I was about 14. My best friend told me to come over the back way so none of the neighbors would see me walk up to the front door. I hung myself by the back of the pants on the wire fence and ripped a bug hole in the back of my new jeans.

I have another piece to this post. A long one, but I received an update from work this evening and so I am putting my previous post back into draft form. Prayers are appreciated. Thanks.

Time Marches On and On

This weekend came with a wonderful gift. I was invited to visit my little friends Julia, Charlotte and their brother William on Saturday afternoon. It's been six months since I left the daycare in Macedon and I haven't seen them in all that time. Mom showed them pictures before I arrived and they were all excited to find me at the door. It did not take long at all for them to warm up, show me their snacks, bring me toys and books and sit in my lap. They will be turning 2 years old in just a few weeks and were just five months old when I started caring for them. Oh, my heart! I have missed them so much!

I didn't go to church this morning. Whether I am struggling with anxiety or something else I do not know. My heart has been knocking on my chest wall again this weekend. The doctor offered a medication for anxiety but I'm hoping to settle my mind and body without. Deep breaths. Lots of deep breaths.

Across town lives a beautiful, old friend. She has faced a lifetime of tragedies and was on my heart this afternoon. I decided to go knock on her door and see if she was home. I told her I'd come to give her a hug and tell her that I love her. She offered me a cup of coffee (I had water instead) and we sat and talked at her kitchen table. I hugged her tight before leaving and kissed the spot on her forehead where I accidentally hit her in the head with a tennis racket when we were teenagers. 

A little before 3 pm I met Hannah for a late afternoon lunch. We decided on the Tropical Smoothie Cafe. 

The weather was mild today, the perfect day for an afternoon walk. I decided on the "biggest" block and walked past the woods at the Dead End and on through the bordering neighborhood. Down by the school a little girl was riding her bike in a driveway. Her mother waved and I crossed the street to say hello to Hayleigh from work and her little daughter Savannah. On my way back toward home I passed what looked like a baby white mouse on the sidewalk. After passing I actually turned around and walked back to take a closer look, but it was just a piece of wadded up tissue paper.