It's the nagging question, the one I don't know how to answer, the one the child inside keeps repeating over and over and over again... "Where do I belong?"
Today I long to belong.
It's a feeling that ebbs and flows. Sometimes I am settled and fine, fine alone and feeling fulfilled. Other times the emptiness is all encompassing and I am overcome by the ache deep in my chest and powerless to stop the flow of tears.
I am aware there are people who will think this is my own doing, and I am more keenly aware than any of them of my reasons for walking away, but that does not mean I wanted to leave. It doesn't mean some days I don't desperately want to return... and know I can't at the very same time.
(((hugs))) Prayers for that longing to be filled.
ReplyDeleteSue
Thank you, Sue. Thank you so much.
DeleteEarthly human feelings are so real, to belong is one of the strongest emotions we feel. You are still on a journey....and the only place I know any of us really belong, is to our God and Maker, the one who feels far away, but loves you with a love stronger than any human can give. They are easy words for me to give since I'm surrounded by a loving family, but I'm also been in dark deep valley that that many don't even know about, and I know you can be lonely and alone surrounded by people. So my dear Martha, keep doing what your doing, moving forward.. I think of Pilgrems Progress and how many dangers, and black places he had to face before reaching the Celestrial land!! It's a jouiney.
ReplyDeleteLove you so much, wish I could hold you in my arms as a mom holds a child and kiss away the hurts.
Thank you for your love and prayers. I'm certain I will come back to read this time and again and feel your hand in mine as I travel on.
DeleteI love you too.
Your photo of the heart stone is the perfect photo for your thoughts in this post. As a widow I sometimes tell myself, you are not alone, God is always with me and at my side. That is very reassuring. Peace to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Terra, for your thoughts and encouragement. Even in our darkest moments we are never alone.
DeleteThe stone heart, Terra, caught my eye when I was down at the lake on Thursday,
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