Spring is struggling to arrive in upstate NY. My daffodils bloomed overnight but the trees are still naked and bare. Today is almost balmy, next week is forcast to be cold and rainy. 
Next week I will paint puzzles, visit the laundromat, and do my shopping. Warm temperatures will return (I promise, Stacy) but I'm not sure when.
I read a news article the other day that suggested exercising self-control might actually be "bad for you." Seems they figure the more one deprives himself early in the day, the more likely he is to wear down his "self-control mechanism" and lose it altogether later on in the evening. Interesting... Of course I don't believe it, but I still find it interesting.
In a world where pregnancies often end abruptly God still hears and answers prayer. It is quite possible that I will never be able to look at the face of this small child without remembering that his life is a miracle, an answer to many tearful heartfelt prayers. Although his daddy claims atheism, I pray this little one will come to know and believe there is a God in heaven who loves and cares for him, and that his life has purpose beyond this world. Not all prayers are answered in the way we hope, I know that, but I also know that if I fail to pray I will never know the blessing of being answered.
The day seems to be growing colder as the afternoon wears on. A lake breeze has picked up letting us know that the waters of Lake Ontario are still bitterly cold. It chased me inside when I returned home from Webster this afternoon. The sunshine is inviting but the temperatures are not. In spite of the cold my daffodils have decided to bloom. They are braver than me. Very soon the temperatures will warm and I will be out enjoying the sunshine too. Until then you will find me in the house.
I am always in wonder when a Sunday morning sermon touches on so many aspects of the previous week. It's even more amazing when I find the pastor preaching the exact passage I looked up the night before (especially when he's going through the book of Matthew and it was 1 Corinthians 15:12-19 I had been reading). I love when God confirms what He has been teaching or showing me. Each time this happens I'm sure I feel Him smile... Is that possible?It was in a church in Munich that I saw him, a balding heavy-set man in a gray overcoat, a brown felt hat clutched between his hands. People were filing out of the basement room where I had just spoken. It was 1947 and I had come from Holland to defeated Germany with the message that God forgives. ...
And that's when I saw him, working his way forward against the others. One moment I saw the overcoat and the brown hat; the next, a blue uniform and a visored cap with its skull and crossbones. It came back with a rush: the huge room with its harsh overhead lights, the pathetic pile of dresses and shoes in the center of the floor, the shame of walking naked past this man. I could see my sister's frail form ahead of me, ribs sharp beneath the parchment skin. Betsie, how thin you were!
Betsie and I had been arrested for concealing Jews in our home during the Nazi occupation of Holland; this man had been a guard at Ravensbruck concentration camp where we were sent. ...
"You mentioned Ravensbruck in your talk," he was saying. "I was a guard in there." No, he did not remember me. "But since that time," he went on, "I have become a Christian. I know that God has forgiven me for the cruel things I did there, but I would like to hear it from your lips as well. Fraulein, ..." his hand came out, ... "will you forgive me?"
And I stood there — I whose sins had every day to be forgiven — and could not. Betsie had died in that place — could he erase her slow terrible death simply for the asking?
It could not have been many seconds that he stood there, hand held out, but to me it seemed hours as I wrestled with the most difficult thing I had ever had to do.
For I had to do it — I knew that. The message that God forgives has a prior condition: that we forgive those who have injured us. "If you do not forgive men their trespasses," Jesus says, "neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses." ...
And still I stood there with the coldness clutching my heart. But forgiveness is not an emotion — I knew that too. Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart. "Jesus, help me!" I prayed silently. "I can lift my hand, I can do that much. You supply the feeling."
And so woodenly, mechanically, I thrust my hand into the one stretched out to me. And as I did, an incredible thing took place. The current started in my shoulder, raced down my arm, sprang into our joined hands. And then this healing warmth seemed to flood my whole being, bringing tears to my eyes.
"I forgive you, brother!" I cried. "With all my heart!"
For a long moment we grasped each other's hands, the former guard and the former prisoner. I had never known God's love so intensely as I did then.
Corrie died on April 15, 1983 in Orange, California, on her ninety-first birthday.
References:Ten Boom, C., Sherril, J., Sherril, S., (1971): The Hiding Place. New York: Bantam.Ten Boom, C., Buckingham, J. (1974). Tramp for the Lord. New York: Jove Corrie Ten Boom by Cheryl Cheek Guidepost article ©1972 "I'm Still Learning to Forgive
It's finally finished. Mom will be happy tomorrow and she will spend hours this next week pouring over the pages of her new book. I hope she likes it. Although it's not perfect (I found way too many typos), it's still a satisfying project. A year's worth of blogging bound into one book. If I spent more time making books I might be able to work out the mistakes I make in putting them together but the finished products always make me smile just the same. At this year's library sale I will be looking for old books to dismantle and make into new books. The covers are recyclable!
In the past I've made recipe books for my kids and sisters. I gathered old family recipes and all- time favorites and put them together into one great little collection called "The Over-Used Recipe Book". They made wonderful gifts. Last month Hannah and I bound small autograph sized books for her friend's birthday and I'm thinking about possibly putting together a little devotional book with all my "scripture ponderings". It will be a good way for me to remember how much the Lord has taught me over the past few years. He is good!
Sunshine. I love how it looks, I love how it warms my skin, I love how it makes me feel. I am just waiting for the air temperatures to match and then I will be outside rambling around instead of staying cooped up inside. Soon the flowers will be calling.
Is it possible to plan for flexibilty? Being flexible is not one of my strong points. I like to know what is going on and don't like being left hanging wondering what to do. God is working on that. He is teaching me that I will not always know what each day will bring and that like clay on the potter's wheel, I must be willing to yield to His touch. When my heart is hard and stubborn, more water must be poured over my life, more of His holy word, to make my heart soft and my spirit willing to be shaped and molded for His use. When pressures mount and it I feel pressed on every side, will I see His loving hands wrapped around my life? Will I yield or will I struggle? This day my prayer is that I will allow my Heavenly Father to turn me in His hand and make of me a vessel of honor.
Monday was James' birthday. We didn't have any big gathering or anything but I do want him to know he's loved and appreciated, so I baked him a pineapple upside down cake. It's one of my favorites too but I resisted the urge to taste and had vanilla ice cream instead.
That's right, we woke up to snow this morning. Not surprising here in western NY, but distressing just the same. It won't stick around long and maybe by next week, during spring break, we'll be enjoying sunshine and walks in the park. We can always hope so.
After visiting the eye doctor this morning we stopped at the public library. I found a book, Cobblestone Quest, to help me in my study of Cobblestone houses. Although there are a few scattered across the United States, 90%, are within 65 miles of Rochester, NY. This is The Maxwell Creek Carriage House which serves as a Bed and Breakfast. I'll have to look for it next time I drive that direction. (The photo is from their website.
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I have lately taken a fleeting fancy to cobblestone houses. If the Three Little Pigs had lived near Lake Ontario this is the type of house the Third Little Pig would have built. No wolf can blow one down. They are strong, sturdy, have thick walls and usually a good chimney or two in case a wolf gets angry enough to try and sneak in like Santa Claus. 
All long the lake shore are smooth, round stones in abundance At one time they were collected, sorted and used as building material. They make a very pretty and unique building form. Nicer, I think, than bricks.
In the eighteen-hundreds everything from houses, churches, and stores, to barns and outbuildings might be made of cobblestones. My great grandfather once used them to line the edge of his driveway and build both a lamp post and a miniature lighthouse.
This verse has come to mind or been mentioned several times in the past couple of weeks including this morning's message. Of course the people of Jerusalem are not the only ones unwilling to be gathered into the arms of Jesus. It wouldn't have mattered if God had called the country of China, the citizens of Italy, or the people of North America, the rejection would have been, and still is, the same. Although He has given His all for His creation, we are all too often resistant to His calling. Today I pray for a willing heart and an obedient spirit that when He calls I will not only hear but heed His voice.
Last night James and I finally made our way down to Canandaigua to eat at the Rheinblick German Restaurant. In spite of the rainy weather we had a very nice evening together. After a quick hug from the hostess we were shown to our table by the lovely Miss M. It is so hard to decide what to order when dining out. After much deliberation I chose the Kassler Rippchen (otherwise known as pork chops and sauerkraut) and James the Wiener Schnitzel. Mmmmm, yummy! We almost left without dessert but when the smiling hostess came out to show us the choices, we couldn't resist; Heidi’s Käsekuchen and Linzer Torte. A wonderful evening in a beautiful place. Thank you, Gudl!
There are days when I feel like anything but a conqueror... It often seems as though I fight the same battles day after day and year after year. Somehow, through it all, I must trust that I am being shaped and molded into His image, that no matter how many times I fail, I can continue to follow because He is leading me.
My week has been busy with watching little people. Josh keeps us entertained with his funny antics and use of language. He is quite the talker and often surprises us with what he will say. Hannah told us how he sat on the bottom step and said "I sit down." He is a smiley little guy and it's easy to forget what a sober faced baby he once was. Poor little boy cut all his teeth at once and just didn't feel like smiling. He's making up for it now.
Lucas is 3 months old already. Smiles are easier to come by now and so are the sweet baby coos these little ones make. He is a wiggler and absolutely can not hold still while drinking a bottle. He prefers to be held, even while sleeping, which can prove to be challanging. Bethany brought me her baby swing to help keep him settled. I'm hoping it will help him sleep when it's time for me to put him down.
James and I spent the weekend helping some friends move. It was a good exercise in flexibility and a good exercise in giving also. We were blessed with beautiful warm, dry weather which has now moved on out of the area. Today is gray, overcast and feeling slightly winter-like. I inhaled more than my fair share of dust over the weekend, because moving is just that kind of a job, and have consumed large amounts of decongestants and antihisitmines in a concerted effort to fend off sinus headaches. So far, in spite of feeling rather sluggish and achy, I am doing okay.
God is teaching me patience and flexibility, or at least I think that is the goal. I must admit I wish it wasn't such a tediously trying process. It would be so much easier if I could just open my mouth and swallow it rather than have it worked into my life a little bit at a time. So often I want to run off and do my own thing. I don't especially desire to put the wants and needs of others above my own, and I certainly don't wish to be "inconvenienced" by the unpredictable schedules of those around me. I want to know what is going on and I don't want the itinerary changed, but God, in His wisdom, has another plan, a plan to mould and shape me into His image. It is not my job to fight and resist, rather to become soft and pliable in His hand. He is the Master. He knows what is best.
Computers and the World Wide Web have made connecting with friends an interesting venture. Many years ago a family friend gave this note of encouragement and vintage coin to our childhood neighbor. At the time Lisa was just a little girl and the friend an adult. This month she found the note and coin in an old jewelry box and made contact with my sisters and I on Facebook (resulting in my post on Family Ties). Well, I got curious where our old friend disappeared to. The last time we knew of his whereabouts he was in Florida planning to buy a sailboat, but I also knew he had family in the Minneapolis area. I started a search which led me to Classmates.com where I typed up an email only to have it ask me to become a "gold member" in order for my friend to read my email. Baaa! Evidently Classmates is pretty good at coercing people to send them money because they sent him an email notifying him of a message from "Martha T." Finally having an unusual first name has payed off! He didn't pay to receive the message either, instead, after trying to remember our last name, he looked us up in the phone book online. Yesterday I got a phone call from the Philippines where my friend has lived for the past four years. We had a wonderful conversation and when I asked if the call was costing him an arm and a leg, I heard him smile as he said, "Well, it's cheaper than flying."
After a busy day yesterday, I was up early this morning to run out to the store before picking up Lucas for the afternoon. Unfortunately after giving my fuzzy little dog a haircut yesterday afternoon, I am feeling rather spacey and head achy today. (This happens when people with dog allergies inhale doggy fur, and a lack of night time sleep exacerbates the problem.) Luckily, I have an ample supply of decongestants in my cupboard and should be breathing easy soon. In the meantime a cup of green tea with honey and a nap on the couch are in order. By the way, Sofie's haircut is looking rather cute and all it cost was an hour or so of time and a day or two of sinus pressure. No time to complain, there will be grandbabies here again tomorrow.
So anyway, yesterday we took a ride out to get some maple syrup. The little store was packed with a group on a field trip, so we looked at the animals (two goats, two sheep, a bunny rabbit, and several ducks and chickens), and then, because we were freezing, decided to walk down to the sugar shack where the sweet steam from boiling sap makes the air smell like pancakes. Mr. Everson welcomed us in, told us a little about the syrup making process, and showed us his barrels of maple syrup waiting to be bottled. 
The cold nights this March have made it a good year for collecting sap. We purchased a half gallon of syrup for ourselves and a small bottle for Troy's daddy (His birthday is tomorrow...), some maple cream for toast, and a package of maple sugar candy. Yummy! It was a bright sunny day, perfect for a ride through the countryside.
One spring, back when I was a little girl, just five years old, a new family moved into the house two doors down. They had three children, a girl about 7, a boy of 5, and a one year old baby girl. My earliest memories are the boy and I riding circles in the street on our tricycles. That summer Al and I picked flowers in the back yard for his "mummy", cooked mudpies in a spot of dirt, and shared a good many afternoons driving our tricycles through the back yard where he was confined to play. In the fall we started kindergarten and our mothers became close friends. They shared coffee in the afternoon while their little girls played together and I'm sure shared a good many secrets as women often do. There were pets in the house two doors down; first a shaggy dog named Laddie, and later a white German shepherd named Bianca and a black and brown collie named Ace of Spades. Al and I not only went to kindergarten together but first and second grades too. We shared the same bus stop and when the roll was called at school my name always followed his. His father had a wonderful voice and
often played the organ and sang. I loved to listen. In June of 1972 my mother's friend died tragically and suddenly. It was a terribly sad day etched forever in my memory. Without their mother to care for them the family was packed up and moved to Canada where they lived with relatives for the next two years before returning to the neighborhood home. By then circumstances had changed somewhat and the children were discouraged from spending too much time at our house, but our friendships had been forged in steel and nothing ever stopped Angel, Al, or myself from being together. I have so many good memories; 4-square in the street, hide and go seek in the dark, campfires in our backyard, walks about town, and late night knocks on my bedroom window. In August of 1979 a cousin came to visit my friends and ended up staying indefinitely. Eventually he and I were married and the friends two doors down became family. As a child I'd never known her as "Aunt" Sharon, but I had known her, and my husband never did. Now sometimes when I look at my daughter or see her smile, I catch a little glimpse of Aunt Sharon in her lovely face, and once in a great while I have to smile myself when I notice my son reminding me a little bit of Al.
I fully expected to catch myself a leprechan this evening. Unfortunately his mother's plans were changed when the daddy didn't have to go to class tonight. (That's okay, it was the daddy's birthday...) I did however find that a leprechan of some kind or other left his hat hanging on a chair in my kichen. He must have smelled the corned beef simmering in the crockpot, but he didn't bother to show up for supper. Too bad cause we had plenty to share.
Troy is not here this week. The college his dad works at is closed for spring break. It was a beautiful day for a ride in the sunshine so Ben, Hannah and I decided to go to the mall. I checked out a cool toy store and decided to buy something. I'm still a kid at heart, I love toys, and I have little grandsons, so I bought some Cutting Food to play with Josh. Sara and Alysa checked it out after school and it passed the kid test. (I knew it would.) I hope Josh likes it too. He should be here tomorrow night and we'll check it out.
Living by the lake is an adventure. Although my boating excursions are now but distant memories, the water side remains fresh and ever calling. Some of my favorite Bible stories are those of Jesus out on the sea with His disciples. Lake Ontario helps draw a realistic picture in my mind when it comes to storm clouds billowing up over the water or the waves foaming angrily at the shore. Boating usually results in my getting seasick making it necessary to lie down in the bottom of the boat and close my eyes. I don't suppose Jesus got seasick even if he was asleep on a pillow in the bottom of the boat. My poor swimming skills keep me ever respectful of the danger of deep water and without a life preserver I'm never quite at ease. I'm thankful for my heavenly life preserver, the one who can still the waves with a simple command and keep me safe in His hand.
Another trip down to the bay. We didn't have any bread for the birds this time, just a camera to take a few photos. These must be the best fed birds in the area as there is always someone there with a loaf of bread or a bucket of corn. As I watched this woman feed the swans and geese, I couldn't help but think of the scripture that tells of God taking care of even the birds. They aren't a bit worried about the economy or if anyone will show up tomorrow with something to eat. Can I trust Him like the birds do? Of course I can, but will I?
It's been a tired kind of week. I'm not quite sure why unless it's the time change. I should be adjusted by now, but I still feel slightly thrown off. I've decided that my hair needs to be pinned back in order to look decent and I really should used the blow dryer if I am going to keep it tame. Today it is a bit on the wild side. I still think it needs to be "fixed" but I'm not sure who will do the fixing or when.
For the past couple weeks I have been rearranging my eating habits again. I hate to see the scale continue to creep upward and I know that cutting gluten out of my diet is to my advantage, so almost two weeks ago I stopped eating breads, cereals, potatoes, rice, chips, and sugars. I stopped drinking coffee and started drinking green tea with honey instead. I have lost several pounds and am able to wear jeans that have long lain unworn in my dresser drawers. I am enjoying lots of vegetables, big salads, scrambled eggs, lean meats, cheeses, and an occasional banana or bowl of applesauce. So far, so good...
Although the rain is not yet over and gone, I am hopeful that the winter is past. I have heard the singing of birds more often and have even seen a robin hopping about in my yard. The ducks and geese are again considering the backyard as a possible home and voice their opinion as to my presence when I go out to look at them. These Canada geese have not been tamed and taught to eat bread from our hands like those down at Irondequoit Bay, instead they are fearful and fly off when I appear. That is okay with me, I really do not want them setting up permanent residence in my yard. I much prefer to visit them at the lake. I do, however, enjoy their honking as they fly overhead. They are another sure sign of spring.
Late yesterday morning Hannah and I headed out to Webster. Ben was gone to help James on a job and we were alone so we decided to do some shopping and stop to visit Grandma and Grandpa. Years ago I stopped at my parent's home often but now my visits are few and sporadic. I thought it was time we stopped by.
If not for a very small child in my care today, I would have gone out for a walk in the wonderfully warm weather; it was around 60 degrees! Instead I stayed in, read books to Troy, baked some yummy chocolate chip cookies, and held a bottle for a hungry Lucas. I did, however, step outside into the balmy temperatures this afternoon to take a look around the yard and to call my three-legged dog who has once again gone missing. I let her out this morning and she hasn't returned. (She is nothing short of annoying!) Our backyard "lake" is draining nicely. I don't think the ducks will be moving in this year. I found some flowers beginning to sprout in my gardens. The crocuses are pushing their way up into the sunshine and so are these little snowdrops. I guess spring is on it's way afterall!
It is a good day for baking cookies. We have lots of milk in the fridge and nothing tastes better for a snack than milk and cookies. In the past two weeks I have made double batches of both peanut butter and molasses cookies. Both batches disappeared very quickly and without much help from me. I indulged in just one peanut butter cookie and had not even a bite of my very favorite molasses. I have determined to change my eating habits, but I still love to bake and watch my friends and family enjoy the results.
It is also a good day for reading stories. Troy has already had me read Huge Harold. Bill Peet is one of our best loved authors. He has written so many wonderful children's books and the pictures he drew for them are classic. I think maybe after lunch we will read a few more stories, maybe the one about Hubert's Hair-Raising Adventure. If only I could find some crocodile tears, like Hubert, I could make my hair grow faster too. Next week I will visit the library and find some more Bill Peet books, maybe Jennifer and Josephine or Smokey.
Lucas didn't stay today, but was here long enough for some cousin time with Josh. James took my van keys to work this morning. I borrowed Bethany's rental car when she went to work. Josh went with me to pick Troy up from preschool and the three of us enjoyed lunch at The Candy Kitchen. Troy and Josh shared a kid's meal of apple sauce, grilled cheese, chips and chocolate milk. Josh smiled all the way home from lunch because he had a friend in the backseat with him. It was cute. Today was a beautiful day. I tied Sofie outside on her leash for a little while. When I returned to check on her, I found that her collar had come undone and she wasn't tied at all. Thankfully she was still there. I'm tired of cheap dog collars. Tonight I am tired. Probably from all that stressing over my hair.
I am posting an old photograph this morning. Fourteen years ago I had short hair, but my husband loves it long and so I have let it grow. The problem is in knowing what to do with long hair. I tie it back; that is the only thing I know how to do. Yesterday I thought it would be nice to have it trimmed up a bit; cut the layers back, and give it a fresh look. I have decided that even some experienced hairdressers truly do not know how to cut hair. I can't go back and complain to someone I have known since high school, even if we never were best friends. I will have to deal with the bad cut, and it is bad, and wait for my hair to grow. I have never been good at the "grin and bear it" thing, at least not when it comes to my hair. On the positive side, I have been losing some weight. Maybe I can deal with the hair better if I am not also dealing with a double chin...
Hannah and I got up a little early this morning and headed out to Webster for some shopping. We stopped in Walmart first for cat food, laundry detergent, soap, toothpaste and other various and sundry items. From Walmart we went to Wegman's for a few grocery items and then stopped for gas before going to Dave's house to pick up Lucas. We still had a little over an hour before noon, when I have to get Troy from preschool, so I thought maybe I could squeeze in a haircut. I've been wanting to get it cut for weeks now. (The top photo is from a week or so ago. It's my wild hair.)
Finally my hair was done, I paid for the cut and we headed home. I don't like my hair. It looks chopped. I wet it down and blew it dry. I sprayed it with a half gallon of "Instant Freeze". I am afraid to go near the wood stove. I think it looks a little better but now I can't relax. If I lay down or lean my head back with hair this crunchy, it might break off.
Yesterday afternoon was cold and brisk, but the sun was shining, so we decided to go for a ride along the lake. I stuffed the last few slices from a loaf of bread into my coat pocket, just in case we should happen upon any hungry birds. James had not been down to feed the birds at the bay, so we decided it was a good place to stop. The wind was bitter and the birds were biting. The swans fascinate me, even if they are intimidating. There is something exciting about the threatening way they look me in the eye, as if they are about to attack. They are the least intimidated of all the water foul at the bay and think nothing of walking right up next to us. I wounder how swan tastes?
Rather than heading back toward home we drove further along the lake toward Charlotte (pronounced Shar-lot) and the "Port of Rochester". I am looking forward to returning to these places when the weather warms up in a few weeks. By April we'll have to take the long way around as the bridge at the bay outlet will be removed for the summer. Maybe one day we'll take a tour of the Charlotte Lighthouse. That's it in yesterday's photo.
