Ready or Not, Here It Comes

I thought I'd be ready for Chritmas, but I'm not. I'm running out of time and the pressure is on, but I'm sitting here with my computer, listening to Christmas music, and pretending I have all the time in the world. I did put a few things into gift bags last night and I wrapped some Christmas books for my grandchildren. I almost made cookies, but found I had no anise extract and wasn't ready to brave the grocery store twice in one day. Not on the Saturday before Christmas. So I didn't.

I still don't know exactly how or where I'll spend the majority of Christmas Day, but tomorrow afternoon I have plans to help the Cabinetmaker assemble lasagnas for the holiday meal. (Maybe I'll find my anise extract there...) Each Christmas gets progressively harder. I don't think it's supposed to be like this. How did I end up with grown up children who can't gather together in peace and harmony? What happened to the days of "writing nice things about each other" and "sitting on the couch touching"? The days of my own attempts at sibling peace are gone and all I can do is pray they work things out... It's out of my control. (Step 1. Admitted we were powerless over others- that our lives had become unmanageable.)

I must admit, I didn't spend much time as I'd wanted in preparing my own heart this Christmas. I'd intended on more anticipation, more thinking on the season of Advent, but doing it alone is challenging. There were no parties, not even a work party, and no children's Christmas pageants. (I'm not even sure my grandkids do those... ) Still, I have much to be thankful for, a new grandson, a roof that doesn't leak during cold, December rains, and a Savior who is the reason we celebrate. The Light of the World, remembered on the darkest day of the year.