Out for a Visit

Rachel and I missed our visit with Tim on Monday. Apparently he had a bad cough and they had just put him on antibiotics. Not only that but he was having great difficulty walking. He does a lot of shuffling and his feet often seem "stuck" to the ground. It's kind of sad because he used to be so hard to slow down and now he can hardly walk...

We didn't talk to any of the workers ahead of the visit as no one was answering the phone there. As we got out of the car the visiting nurse was just pulling in. It was nice to talk to someone who seemed genuinely concerned for his condition. Someone who would try to answer a few of our questions. It seems he is currently being weaned off some of the psych drug he has been given, a few of them in very high doses.

We had a good visit and a pleasant ride through the countryside. He ate the snacks Rachel had packed and never cried or complained. We listened to a CD of Dad playing on the car stereo and sang along here and there. On the way back we stopped at Wendy's for the traditional Frosty. The ride was peaceful and our minds were set at ease over our brother's well being. It was a good afternoon.

This morning, while Emily and I waited for the bus, I took some flower photos. Looks like I do have something beside daffodils. A lonely hyacinth. And my daffodils? They wear all different kinds of clothes. Aren't they pretty?

P's and Q's

P is for P's and Q is for Q's, but no one is really sure what P or Q stands for. I think it makes a great way to catch up on two weeks worth of ABC Wednesdays.

Whenever I have heard the expression, "Mind your P's and Q's" it's always appeared to be a reference to having good behavior, kind of like saying, "Mind your manners." At any rate, it's a warning to pay attention to what you're supposed to be doing and whether or not it has anything to do with a P or Q is anybody's guess.

For more ABC Wednesday, click here.

Mudding

Remember Ben? He got a flat tie on his old Ford truck last Sunday. This Sunday he got his Colorado stuck in the mud out in the orchard. His big brother went to the rescue. I think Dave pulled with a tow rope while Ben pushed and Morgan took the wheel. I'm sure it will be an experience to remember, one they'll talk about for years to come..

He was covered head to toe when he showed up on our back porch. His dad threw him some pajama pants and a t-shirt and he changed in the barn before coming in to take a shower. Good thing he cleans up nice.

Gates Hall

Down the road and around the corner from where we live is a little theater called Gates Hall. It may or may not be the oldest continually used theater in the US. Either way it is listed on the National Register of Historic Places and has been used as a community theater since 1867. (a little history if you're interested...) Several times each year the Gatesinger Company puts on a show. The latest was Rogers & Hammerstein's Oklahoma.

The theater is housed in an historic building. The stage is small and seating is limited. Many of the audience are locals, as are most of the cast members. Every show is sold out ahead of time, the audience is packed in like sardines, and folks go back time and time again to enjoy an old time theater experience.

Although I have been a little more than vaguely aware of the theater the past few years, I had never been to a show. My daughter Hannah has been to several, and this because she has friends who have participated in the musicals. She went to last Saturday night's show with a group of friends. Last night James and I went. They put on a wonderful show and I find myself asking why I have never gone before. It really was fun.

Please Pray

The little town of Webster, NY has surely seen it's share of pain and sorrow the past few years and last Saturday evening brought another tragic event. A horrendous car accident has left a seventeen year old girl in guarded condition, fighting for her life, while her friend and driver of the car faces felony charges. (Part of the story is here)

This story touches close to home too. The girl was once part of our church youth group, one led by my son and his wife. Her cousin is a personal friend. Two years ago they traveled "home" to Ukraine together and I know he is hurting too. He is away at medical school and probably not able to come home. I'm thankful to have been able to send him a note to tell him he is in my thoughts and prayers. The whole story makes me so sad...

A fund has been set up to help offset medical expenses. If you feel so inclined to donate, here is the link. And thank you for praying.

Benjamin

Number six out of seven. Twenty years old. He works in a collision shop in East Rochester and recently moved into his first apartment. I'm glad he stops home often 'cause sometimes I miss my grown up kids. And the girl? That's Morgan. She's his trusty sidekick. :0)

Spring Morning

There are lots of things not to blog about, and lots of reasons I don't want to blog at all on any given day. It's been that kind of a week. There have been some really great days and some other days that were really trying. However, in spite of life's challenges, and we all have them, there is plenty to be thankful for and I did find some nice photo ops outside early this morning.

The sun was shining when I stepped out the door to wait for the bus with my friend Emily. Sunlight lit up a ball of dew on every blade of grass and sent me back inside for my camera. Of course, I had missed the moment and by the time I got back outside the shimmer wasn't the same. Still, the rain was giving everything a fresh kind of look and Emily in my rocking chair swing also caught my eye.

The daffodils are blooming, but most of the other flowers are holding back, or maybe I'm missing them because I really don't want to be outside much when it's cold and wet. This one stood apart from the rest looking solitary and alone.

 I checked on my favorite salmon colored  tulip hiding in a garden behind my lilac, and found it getting ready to bloom. She's always first among the tulips. She's had some tough times in life too (see here) but has made a very nice recovery. Maybe one day I'll dig her up again and move her to a more visible location. She's so pretty that it's sad not to have her show off just a little.

Smile!

For the past few weeks I've been struggling with an unusual problem. My tongue hurts as though it's been burned. The symptoms started not long after my mom passed away. I searched the internet for answers with no real success. Was I sick? Could it be related to depression?

Toward the beginning of April I finally talked to my brother in law's ex who has some expertise in the area of acupuncture and symptoms that show up on tongues. At the time it appeared that my tongue had a split in the middle and Amanda suggested a major cause was primarily dehydration. At the time I'd been drinking a pot of green tea and a pot of herbal tea each day, so I gave up the tea and started drinking just water. My tongue seemed to get better and then suddenly got worse again.

Yesterday I did some more internet searching and found a reference to possible reactions to toothpaste... That got me thinking. For years I have always bought the "cheap" toothpaste, Aim, Ultrabright..., the ones that cost little more than a dollar per tube, but when my mom passed away, she'd left a half used tube of Crest Pro Health. I'd used the remainder of the tube and liked how my teeth felt, so I bought another tube a couple weeks ago. When did my symptoms start? Yeah, soon after my mother's passing... What do you know? All kinds of people have complained about tongue and mouth pain after using Crest Pro Health products.

In the meantime, I've given up drinking both coffee and tea every morning and have spent the last week drinking just water. That probably won't last forever but it's nice to know I'm currently caffeine free.

Tea, Toast, and Turtle Eggs

Last Tuesday we glanced out the living room window and saw an unusual sight. A snapping turtle was making its way up through the grass toward the house. It  had traveled quite a distance from the drainage ditch on the edge of our property and I found myself wondering how long the entire trip actually took.

Of course it's not every day that a turtle shows up outside my window. I called Rocky to see and grabbed my camera.

I am not a fan of taking photos through screens, so I had to go outside and get a better look at the prehistoric creature. (How cool is that?)

She made it all the way up into my flower garden where I assume she may have placed her nest. I didn't stick around to watch so I can't really be sure, and when I looked later in the afternoon, she had finished whatever business she had and there was no trace of her.


No such fun stuff today, just a cold rain. On the bright side, tomorrow's rain should be warmer.

Time Out

I didn't do much blogging last week and left a bit of a hole in my usual routine. Guess that happens sometimes.

Today I took Hannah out to babysit for a couple hours at Bethany's house. While she was there I took the opportunity to spend some time alone. I drove down to the Webster side of the Irondequoit Bay outlet, past the spot where the firefighters were ambushed in December of 2012. Most of the empty burned out lots have brand new houses being constructed. Only the Spengler lot remains empty and it is so small that over time it will not even be known as an "empty lot" at all. There is no way to drive that little stretch of road without remembering that fateful morning.

I found a parking spot on the lake side away from the construction area, but the view of the water was blocked by houses. There is better parking on the west side where we normally feed the birds, but at this time of year getting there requires a long drive over the bay bridge and down through Irondequoit back to the lake again. The sun was warm and I had taken my Bible and a Max Lucado book along with me. I had two hours to spend so I read Ephesian 4 and 5, and then turned to the book, "The Next Door Savior". At one point I got sleepy and dozed off eventually finding that my mouth was hanging open. Thankfully there were only a few people wandering about down there and all of them passed being my vehicle.

Didn't get much accomplished at home, but I did do two loads of laundry and straighten up the couch. And, I managed to make something for dinner too. Guess that counts for something.

Here I Am

I'm still here. Not really quite sure what to write lately.

Wish I had taken my camera along on our expedition to help our son Ben who had a flat tire on his old Ford truck this afternoon. Not too often do I see he and his dad bent over next to a vehicle on the side of the road. The tire James brought to replace the blown one had a different lug nut setup and so they ended up putting the flat one back on and we crawled down the road behind them on the way home. Thankfully, we only had to drive a few miles of country roads. That was when I really wished I had grabbed my camera. Picture an old Ford truck driving down country roads with the girlfriend sitting in the middle of the seat next to the guy. And that's why I should always keep my camera handy.

Tamales

It's been a long week...

On Wednesday I had no small children. It was a gift. The day was dark and overcast and I decided early on to try something I don't normally tackle myself. It isn't a difficult task, per say, just time consuming.

I started with the chuck roast in my fridge. It went into the crock pot early in the morning, about 7 o'clock, with a package of onion soup mix, and then I did some cupboard searching to see what kind of supplies or ingredients I might be missing for the feast. I found a partially used package of crushed red chile from New Mexico (something like this...) and dumped some in a pan of hot water to simmer, but I had no masa and no corn husks, so off Hannah and I went to the Mexican Market in the neighboring town.

By mid afternoon I had a nice piece of beef that shredded easily and a tasty red sauce to stir into it. I realized a little late that my corn husks should soak for about three hours. They were probably in for one and a half. Then I mixed up the dough, found my trusty helper Hannah, and we did the assembly together. It was kind of fun actually and it wasn't long before we filled up the roaster and put them on the stove to steam.

I heard they were very good. My favorite "New Mexican" said they were delicious and my kids have been gobbling them up. I haven't had one yet, my stomach has been off, but we have a bag in the freezer and I'm sure to find one on a plate in front of me before too long.

O is for Ouch

O is for ouch. (That's what you say when something hurts. It's safe to say. Unlike some other words...)

When my sister and I went out to visit our non- verbal autistic brother yesterday, she brought along a few old photographs. One was of my brothers and a cousin with our maternal grandfather. Grandpa Chambery died when I was just a year and a half old. My sisters never met him.

I glanced at the picture, taking in the smiling faces of  my brothers and cousin and set it back in her car's console. A few minutes later she said, "Hey, what happened to Grandpa Chambery's left index finger?"

I laughed. I hadn't realized she didn't know the story. "He got it smashed in an elevator of some kind on the hill by their house," I told her. "It was crushed so bad that they cut his finger open, removed all the broken bones, and rolled the skin up." (Kind of gives you shivers, doesn't it?) I knew the story from Mom, but I'd never noticed his hand in old photos. In fact, I'd have forgotten about it altogether if Rachel hadn't mentioned it.

On our ride with Tim, Rachel showed him the picture. She asked if he knew Grandpa was missing an index finger. (Apparently there is another photo where Tim is holding his left hand.) I reiterated the story and said, "He probably remembers it better than I do." You should have seen the smile on his face. Maybe that's why I got the kiss on the cheek when we dropped him off again. (Then again, maybe he really does think I'm cuter than Rachel.)

For more ABC Wednesday, click here.

Honest to Goodness

Several years ago I read a book that changed my life. It shined a light on the importance of unconditionally respecting my husband, and thus enabling him to love me in a more effective way. James and I don't always get it right, and sometimes we're sent spinning on the "crazy cycle" of no love/ no respect no matter how hard we try. We don't always see things from the same perspective, but in spite of the setbacks that come along in life, we now know better how to get back to the right place. (Read the "crazy cycle" article or you can have the short definition here. "Craziness is when we keep doing the same thing - again and again - with the same ill effect.")

This weekend has brought up the subject of honesty and I'm thinking that being honest comes with a "crazy cycle" all it's own. We've all been taught and encouraged to tell the truth. No one wants to be lied to, but I find that expecting honesty from others comes with a requirement from me. Being honest necessitates making oneself vulnerable, vulnerable to the reaction of the recipient. As one seeking honesty from others, I have to understand that honesty can be extremely fragile, and often painful. As one seeking to be honest, I desperately need others to honor my efforts if at all possible. When my honesty is trampled or dishonored, future efforts to be truthful are much more strained and sometime even avoided altogether.

Thankfully, there is One with whom I can always be honest. He doesn't mock or belittle me, I don't have to worry that He will share my secrets. When I fail, I know the judgement for my sins and shortcomings has already been taken care of at the cross. He stands ready to love and forgive, and if I will accept His forgiveness, I find it much easier to love and forgive those who hurt and disappoint me, loving and accepting those whose background might be a little different from mine becomes a little more natural, and maybe, just maybe that will help me to make a difference in the world too.

Sunday Scripture

Resurrection Sunday should be savored, but this year we are doing absolutely nothing special. I guess it's the mom's responsibility to make it happen, and I dropped the ball this time around... or maybe I dropped the basket. Nevertheless and in spite of my shortcomings, the tomb is empty and He is risen. Nobody needs jelly beans or chocolate to celebrate new life in Christ, and even without the fancy dinner my sins are still nailed to the cross and He's preparing a place in heaven for me.

Another Post

Two posts today, because I spent some time outside this afternoon.

The warm spring weather has returned. Children, whether inside or outside, must be supervised, so out we went into the sunshine. They're kind of like flowers... kind of.

The Stuffs

It's been a week of reflection. There is an empty spot in Mom's room where her hospital bed was. We took it to the local loan closet about a week ago. I was ready to let it go, but am feeling a bit melancholy just the same. I'm not quite sure how to sort through Mom's things. Thankfully, she didn't leave massive amounts of belongings because I already don't know how to "dispose" (that sounds like such a cruel word) of what is left. I've never divided an estate, never sold off possessions. Mostly I stand staring at things and wonder what to do, as if hanging on to things will keep a little bit of my parents here.

China
Bibles
Clothing
Books
Knick-knacks
Slides and pictures




I had three quiet days this week, one of which I spent away from home. The other two found me attempting to sort through some of my own junk collections, turning Mom's room into a kind of catch-all. I've found that sometimes it isn't the letting go that is so hard, but where to send the stuff I'm letting go of.

yard sale
Goodwill
ebay
Etsy
Craigslist

Do I want to put the effort into selling things? Is there a greater benefit in donating? Do I hold a "Great Give Away" with a donation jar toward Hannah's summer mission trip to Grenada?

The truth is that everything feels like a part of Mom and Dad... and I want to hold on to them as long as I can.

N is for Newlyweds

N is for Newlyweds, in this case my parents.

I can't even remember where they went but I don't think it was far from home, at least not outside of New York state. Maybe the Adirondack Mountains... maybe the Thousand Islands... They were young, happy, and looking forward to starting a life together. Their marriage would last for fifty-six years, bring them five children and thirteen grandchildren. The picture doesn't seem so very long ago...

For more ABC Wednesday, click here.

Winter's Back Today

On this dark and dreary winter-ish day, I met my beautiful daughters for lunch. Beth called at the tail end of my Bible study and we agreed to meet at Panera Bread around noon. While I waited for the rest of my party to arrive, I met the eyes of a woman across the room, someone I have seen only once in the past 30 some years. (Facebook is great for catching up with old friends and being able to recognize them decades later.) Mairead and I gave each other a quick hug and I said hello to her husband before he left to pick up their lunches, and then I went back to my waiting.

Tonight I'm missing my parents, both of them. I hunted down my CD of Dad singing hymns and popped it into the computer. It can make me teary, but is comforting at the same time. "God Be With You Till We Meet Again," he sings, and I remember how comforting all those songs were four years ago. Life sure was a lot easier when I was a kid...

A Little Bit of Nothing

Just not sure what to write today...

I could tell you how I accomplished some long put off tasks today...
Or how we had a brief taste of summer this weekend...
I might let you know that I slipped back into drinking coffee these past few days...
Or that I've gone two whole days gluten-free.. or at least eating far less gluten...

I washed my windows today with those pretty little Norwex microfiber cloths my daughter sells. Hannah cleaned my screens with the bathroom scrub mitt, which I rarely use on my tub anyway. My arms and hands are sore, but my windows are sparking.

I'm having a short vacation from small children and hoping to accomplish much in the few days without them. So far, so good.