Sometimes expectations get us in trouble. It was to be a time of solitude, this gray and drippy overcast day. There would be housework to do, but I would do it alone and I would enjoy the rare and precious solitude, and I did.
I am rarely alone in the house, so when there is no one else here, I savor the moments. I covet them. I do not want them disturbed or cut short. I like my time alone, and so when Rachel arrived with Mom at 12:15 pm I found myself suddenly distressed. I had just looked the clock and thought how I had a just few more hours to enjoy by myself, when suddenly it was over. How I came to think Mom wouldn't return until 3 pm, I no longer recall, but that was what I had tucked away in my mind. I thought it was what I had been told, but perhaps I am mistaken. Either way it took both Rachel and me by surprise and neither one of us had our expectations met. It isn't as though Mom is at my heels asking questions or needing help with something, so I am not entirely certain why the let down. (I do leave myself confused. No wonder my family doesn't know what to do with me!)
I suppose next time we should set a more fixed arrival time.
Sunday Stealing: authentically myself
4 hours ago
I must say I am more disappointed with my ruined shoes today than anything else. I hung them by the fire to dry out. It was a nice mellow fire. This afternoon I added some wood and the wild wind outside kicked up a fierce draft. Heated up that wood stove and cooked the bottoms of my expensive second hand shoes. Now they not only stink, but they have lumps in the bottoms. :(
ReplyDeleteWe all have days like this...
ReplyDeleteSome days I KNOW my family doesn't know what to do with me...
You are perfectly normal...
I know what you mean about your "time" alone..
And when it is cut short...or interrupted..
Well...it sucks!!!
Hang in there Martha...
Thank you for the birthday wishes..:o)
Linda :o)
Oh yeah...
DeleteSorry about your shoes...that sucks too!!
I'm wearing the shoes anyway. I think they're okay for wearing around the house and for normal outings, but I wouldn't want to go hiking or traipse about NY City in them anymore.
DeleteExpectations....they can really be frustrating. I had a unrealistic expectation when we retired...I thought I'd be spending tons of time with my kids and grandkids...I guess I forgot they have "lives" "jobs" and "schedules"....I see them, a lot more than when we lived up North...but not want I thought...so I try to love and enjoy each minute I do get with them.
ReplyDeleteSorry about your shoes, and sorry I dumped on you!!! Love you!
I appreciate your dump. :)
DeleteIt's nice to know that I'm not the only one who expects the improbable, impossible, or unlikely.
I remember having a similar conversation with John about 11 years ago. About how unfullfilled expectations lead people to do or say things, or to such great disappointment. Our expectations really are SO powerful.
ReplyDeleteSorry about ruined shoes, too. Maybe they will flatten out a bit? Maybe?
Could you get them re-soled?
ReplyDeleteProbably not, Erin. But they don't feel terribly uncomfortable anyway.
Delete