The Internal Battle

There is piano music playing in the background, a song that touches the heart of me each time I hear it and yet I know not it's name. (Find it here.) Somehow it settles my mind and helps me to think thoughts deeper, to comb the depths of my heart and soul, and to know God is near.

I know not why my heart must ache and struggle always. How is it that I know what is right and good, but am powerless to open the hand and offer back to God what I know only He can make whole? How do I offer to Jesus my selfishness? How do I place into His care that which irritates and annoys? How long will my cup be full of me? How does the cup become empty in order that it can be filled anew?

In the struggle I am forced to look hard at my own faults and failures. I can not place the blame on another, for it is my heart alone that I am able to offer. This is not a "beat myself up" kind of thing, just a realization that I am far from perfect and in need of Someone bigger than myself to make me what I should be. Somewhere in the struggle He will have the victory...

What a gift!