The Duplos

The Duplos came out to play today, giant, bright, primary colored Legos, perfect for little hands. They were, Once Upon a Time, a birthday gift to my own little boy, probably from his grandparents. Some of the pieces may broken or lost, and the storage boxes cracked on the bottoms, but the dinosaur mamas and babies still smile. And little ones still smile when they come out to play.

We brought the boxes out mid morning and Alex was all smiles. It is good that Hannah enjoys Duplos too because I was soon called away to help my other daughter. Bethany, already drained of energy by prolonged morning sickness, had picked up a tummy bug complete with fever and body aches. She needed Tylenol, Gatorade, and someone who loved her to deliver them.

A half hour later I found my ailing daughter curled up under the covers of her bed, Cat at her feet. Josh, dressed and ready for the day, was playing with his Hess truck collection. Molly the Dog wagged a greeting and even Louis the Naughty Cat came along to say hello. I couldn't go home without at least helping my poor girl with her sink full of dishes. Josh came home with me for the afternoon, which both Alex and Emma found quite nice, and I am hoping Bethany had a very good sleep in her quiet house full of animal friends.

Mom

My Uncle Chuck called from Florida this evening to talk to Mom."You know what the Bible says," he told her, "... the arms of the wicked shall be broken... " (Ps. 37:17) Leave it to Uncle Chuck, always the kidder. If he didn't joke and tease, we might be afraid he didn't love us anymore. I'm not sure whether she was amused or not...

This morning, for the first time, I helped my mother with her shower. Strange to now be helping bathe the woman who once did all of this for me... In so very many ways I am humbled. Mom had her second appointment at orthopedics this afternoon. The bone was broken in two places and had to be set last week. Now the doctors check to be sure they remain so. So far everything is good, but old bones are slow to heal and we have an appointment to return again next Monday. In her fall Mom not only broke her wrist, but also banged up her tailbone. I am not sure which injury is causing more discomfort. She appears more incapacitated today than a week ago.

In spite of broken wrists and bruised tailbones, God is here. He has not given up on my often hard and stubborn heart. He knows just where to apply the pressure as this lump of clay spins on the wheel of life. The Master's hands are gentle, and yet firm. Did I not say "I am a work in the hands of the Master Potter. I pray that His fingerprints are all over me as I walk through this life"? (See my sidebar...) Resistance is futile, but His love is sure.

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; 

2 Corinthians 4:7-8

Hope

Now hope does not disappoint... Romans 5:5

This morning I found myself sitting next to my daughter in law at church. I am sad for what seems to be lost, but I am hopeful too. I pray that one day my son will appear there by her side, that he will find it in his heart to love and forgive us, and to realize how very much he is loved.


James stayed at home with Mom today. I am finding myself more concerned for her as time goes on. Her hand is slowly returning to its normal color, but she is sleeping more and more. Yesterday I found her in her pajamas at 5:30 pm. and by six o'clock she was ready to climb in bed. She turned down supper because she had a big sandwich at lunch, and said she'd probably feel better after a good night's sleep.

I left a snack on the table before I went to bed for the night; grapes and a banana muffin. In the morning the grapes were gone. It was after 10 am when she finally got up for the day, and then she went to sleep in her chair. She's asked several times what day it is. I'm unsure of how concerned to be.

She Cried

My heart is a little sad today. I think she's forgotten us...

She still adorable, even when she cries, and I love her.

Today...

I want to write something but I'm not quite sure what to say. I probably should give up and go to bed, but here I sit...

Mom felt good enough today to go out with Rachel to visit my brother. Maybe the shower late this morning perked her up. Rachel and I put our heads together and decided a tub/shower seat and a hose type shower head would be helpful and it was!

While Rachel and Mom were gone I took off for the grocery store. I got the shopping accomplished and arrived back home before Emma got off the school bus. Tomorrow I will stay home with Mom and clean the house. I heard we might have some small company at some point and I am looking forward to that. Maybe I'll make some more cookies in the morning. I hear all good grandmas bake cookies.

I gave my little dog a haircut late this afternoon. It is a long and tedious job and she is not altogether cooperative. She still has a few stray long hairs and probably a few bald spots, but she is looking more tame and can once again see where she is going. I think I even saw her smiling after it was all over. (This picture was taken over a month ago before her hair grew over her eyes.)

And now, it is really time for bed. The wind is picking up and since we are not expecting any tornadoes here, I think I will be able to sleep. I usually sleep good when the wind blows or the thunder rolls and it's almost eleven o'clock.

Thursday Thirteen and ABC Wednesday

Can I combine these two great memes into one? I can, if I come up with 13 words that start with the letter G.

1. great (This is a great list. I can tell already.)
2. Grandma (She's my mom and she broke her wrist on Sunday. I think she's finally starting to feel just a little bit better.)
3. green (I'm looking forward to the grass turning green again.)
4. grass (Can't waste a word now, can we?)
5. gargantuan (I like the sound of that one.)
6. giant ( Kind of like gargantuan, but not so dramatic.)
7. grapes (I like the seedless kind.)
8. geese (There's a whole gaggle out there!)
9. gaggle
10. giraffe ( A very cool animal)
11. gnome ( a word that doesn't sound like G.)
12. guacamole (My Darling just made some. It would have made a very nice ABC Wednesday all on its own.)
13. giggle (that one makes me smile.)

To see the other participants in the new round of 
ABC Wednesday, click here!

And for Thursday Thirteen, click here.

Sigh...

God is once again moving in my life. It is an incredible comfort to feel His tender touch. Hard to explain, but I know He is near.

It has been an incredibly trying few months and the challenge is far from over. Without going into details I will just say that communication is difficult when the hearer misinterprets our words and actions. Explanations are futile and there is no backtracking to right the perceived wrong. Apologizing would be an admission of guilt, and no amount of regret can take it all away. Only God can right what is wrong and change our hearts and the hearts of those we love. He has done it before and we must trust Him to work once again.

Mom had a tiring day. The reality has sunk in along with the pain. She needs help to dress, wash, and lift herself out of the chair. Eating and brushing her teeth is a challenge as she struggles to use her left hand rather than the dominant and wounded right. Even puzzles, word searches, and reading the newspaper take more effort and concentration. My heart is softening with each task I do for her, and yet I know that being forced to use her left hand over her right is good brain exercise for her so if she is able, I let her do it on her own.

Bethany, bless her heart, came over this morning to help her grandma so I could go out to Ladies' Prayer and Bible study. I won't be leaving Mom home alone for a while to come and so appreciate my family who is so willing to help. God is good and though a broken wrist in certainly painful and I wouldn't ever wish it on anyone, I believe God will use this ugly/beautiful blessing to draw us into a better relationship and I am thankful.

Violet

Mom did not think she needed to see a doctor yesterday, and was fairly certain we were wasting time and money going to the orthopedic office this afternoon. I told her if she was a good girl I would get her a lollipop. "I don't want a lollipop," she said.

The bones in her wrist were slightly out of place and in need of a little adjustment. Her wrist was numbed and pressure applied while the cast was setting. I am relieved I didn't listen to her balking, but I think she is just relieved to be home again.

Mom was asleep in her chair when Emma came home from school.
"Look," I said, "Grandma is turning into a blueberry just like Violet Beauregard. Look at her fingers." Em grinned. "Do you know who that is?" I asked. She smiled and nodded her head.

"It's Just Bruised"

Sometimes, in the back of your head, you just know something is going to happen, and no matter how careful you are, it happens anyway.

Today was cold and icy. On our way out to the van and into church I kept a good watch on Mom and, though she resists, held her arm as she walked. Even Mom herself had said on the way out that she wanted her gloves on so that her hands wouldn't be cold if she fell in the snow. Coming home was the same. Both James and I felt it, so we were relieved to get home and have Mom safe on the back porch. She started up the steps with her friendly oxygen tank...

Fast forward a few hours. She insists her hand doesn't hurt even though it is swollen and purple. "It's just bruised," she says, "I'll be fine." But though her hand "doesn't hurt," she treats it like it does. She climbs onto her bed to rest for the first time in 16 months. James thinks the hand looks terrible. He thinks she should see a doctor. Ben has been going with the local volunteer ambulance corp for the past couple weeks. "Old people always insist they're fine," he says. I talk to Rachel who has just returned from her Florida vacation. "Martha says you hurt your hand," she says to Mom. "I'm coming tomorrow morning to take you to the doctor." Mom is compliant. I decide to take her to Urgent Care instead.

"I feel decrepit," says Mom when we return home. I help her undress and get into her pajamas. I cook her some scrambled eggs and toast, even though she says she can't eat. Finally Mom is tucked into her bed, her hand and arm gently wrapped in a soft cast to keep her fractured wrist stable. I worry that God is preparing to stretch me a little further, to break through some of those walls I don't wish to scale. I worry, but I know He is my strength. And just to prove it, my lunch date for tomorrow had to cancel, leaving me free to take Mom to the orthopedist for a hard cast tomorrow. (How did He know?)

No Such Thing

They say there is no such thing as a free lunch...

Yesterday afternoon James and I went out. We stopped at Mom's house to check on things. I set my purse on the sideboard and tucked the house key inside so it wouldn't get lost. After a few minutes we locked the door and headed off for the bank. While waiting for James, I decided to have a piece of gum. I turned around to get my purse and discovered it missing. My purse was locked safely inside my mother's house, along with the only house key in our immediate possession. The other keys were back home at our house, safe but too far to run home for.


We decided to run our errands and go out for lunch anyway. After a quick stop in Walmart, we found a restaurant we thought offered decent salads and went inside. It was late afternoon and not too crazy. We ordered an appetizer and two salads. Midway though my salad, I "crunched" on something no so crunchy. Upon further examination, I found what appeared to be a small plastic screw. It even had the markings for a Phillips head screwdriver on top. Nothing too disturbing on one hand, but not something one hopes to find in a salad either.

The waitress came along to see how everything was and asked if we might care for dessert. We assured her the food had been good, and quietly informed her of my discovery. She went to tell the manager who came out to talk with us and tell us from whence the offending tidbit came. He was very kind and all apologies, and as expected, lunch was on the house.

(The photographs... yesterday afternoon and this morning. Don't like the weather? Just wait a minute.)

A Nail Tale

We went to visit Bethany and took our basket of nail polish. It was fun. :)
 

Feeling Green

Bethany has been feeling green lately... I have been feeling green too, but I am feeling green with growing things and she is feeling pukey. Poor Bethany.

More of my seeds are sprouting. Even seeds that were supposed to take 10 days to germinate are poking their little green selves up through the soil. How fun!  Now if only I had labeled the jars I would know which one was growing.

I have never grown inside vegetables and herbs before. The only time I planted seeds indoors, they grew a fuzzy mold on top of the dirt and eventually the poor little plants keeled over and gave up the fight. I hope that does not happen this time. Maybe one day before too long I will have cilantro, oregano, and parsley growing in my kitchen along with lettuce and spinach.

I wonder what I can plant next?

F is for Fabulous

F is for fabulous. Fantastically fabulous!

I love weddings, especially this one. :)
Getting married is happy, but getting remarried is fabulous! I smile every time I think about it. (That's because I love these two so much! I'm so glad this story has a happy ending.)

To see the other participants in the new round of 
ABC Wednesday, click here!

Nothing, Absolutely Nothing

I have nothing to say. No new news to tell, no big happenings to report. No words of wisdom, no silly stories. I guess nothing to terribly exciting happened today, although we did kidnap a couple of girls this afternoon... well, almost. The ransom note had just been written when their mother came home... I tied her up and left her in the corner and took the girls home anyway.

Well, perhaps I should get off my rear end and do something besides stare at this computer screen...

Is it Spring Yet?

It's been so sunny and spring-like that it feels like time to plant my garden. Too bad planting time is so far off... I've decided to make the best of it and put a couple of those Clementine boxes to good use. Don't know how successful it'll be, but I can have fun trying.

Gone to Pot

Maybe... perhaps... Do you suppose I could have a turn?

:)

The Cat is Outta The Bag!

Yup, that's right! Just 29 weeks to go and it will be the first week of September. Guess the cat had to get out eventually. Well, there you have it! That's our big news.

Almost

I'm almost convinced she plans on starving herself to death.

This Week

This week is almost over. It's been a good week. James and I have embarked on a fruit and vegetable fast. Actually we have also eaten nuts and rice, so it's not completely fruits and veggies. We had a very nice Valentine dinner at home, with sauteed sweet red peppers, onions, and mushrooms with asparagus. I even threw in a handful of slivered almonds for fun (and protein). It's interesting trying to feed the rest of the family "normally" while we eat somewhat different. Good thing everyone loves salad.

Mom and I have worked on a jigsaw puzzle several evenings this week. I find it extremely beneficial if we can do something together, and we both enjoy this. It's not as easy for her as it once was, but she is still able to accomplish enough to feel satisfied that she is doing it. Now if Aunt Margie asks whether she did the puzzle she brought for Christmas, Mom can say yes.

I must say too, that Ladies' Prayer has been a incredible blessing the past few weeks. Just to pray and be prayed for brings such sweet relief. I am ever so thankful that with God there are no denominational lines between churches, and that I am welcome in this Tuesday group in spite of the fact that I am no longer there for Sunday services.

Smiling

Valentine's Day is full of stories, but the best Valentine story this year is the upcoming marriage of one of my best friends, my sis in law Lori and her ex husband Dave. Next week, on what would have been their 31st wedding anniversary, they will be remarried. I smile every time I think about it. :)

See? Miracles do happen! But I already knew that.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Yes, I do know I am a day late, and probably a dollar short as well, but I do appreciate the man who made me his so many years ago. I let far too many special occasions creep up and overtake me before I am ready, so I thought perhaps I could grab this one by the tail before it gets away altogether, and tell you once again how much I love That Man of Mine.

E is for Ew

My daughter and I were driving home yesterday when I asked her if she could think of any good E words for Valentine's day. She looked at me sideways and said, "Ew..." And so here we are. E is for Ew.

I suppose Hannah was thinking of all the mushy stuff that comes along with a holiday dedicated to love, but after all, she is sixteen... Perhaps when she has a special someone of her own, she will decide it isn't "ew". (I don't believe she really thinks so now either, but don't tell her I said so.)


To see the other participants in the new round of 
ABC Wednesday, click here!

Drippy

It was a drippy-doo-da day! All day long water ran off the roof and down the icicles hanging on the front of the house. It would have been a great snowman making day had it been thought of earlier, and definitely a super duper day for a snowball fight. But then again, I am no longer in fifth grade and I do not bounce back from snowball smacks like a fifth grade. I guess the days of snowball wars are sadly behind me.

The snow was pretty yesterday morning (It would have been a wonderful day to be snowed in.) and today was just as beautiful. Today's sun was bright, the skies blue, and the roads clear (unlike yesterday when I drove out to see my niece in her middle school musical), but today I stayed in, aside from my trek down the driveway to the bus stop. Yesterday I drove over snow covered roads and through white-out conditions, today I stayed home. Go figure. I wonder what tomorrow will bring. I'm planning on going out again.

Winter Surprise

For He says to the snow, 'Fall on the earth';

Job 37:6a

It been spring for most of the winter, but this weekend the snow arrived better late than never. Not to be dissuaded by a few inches of snow, we headed out to to church and found it to be somewhat emptier than usual. No surprise, especially since the snow totals were a foot or more by early this afternoon. Even upstate New Yorkers like to have a snow day once in a while.

I had to smile at what my friend Lorrie had to say about the weather this morning...
"Wow good morning " winter " ~ cant believe its the middle of Feb and you still haven't outgrown your beauty"

My snowman fence left me with a grin too. Looks like it got a little too chilly and they pulled the blanket right up to their chins! (I think that snowman has a rather mischievous smile, don't you?)

Abiding Alone

Abide in Me and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine and you are the branches. He who abides in Me and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me, you can do nothing.

John 15:4-5

Could it be that I am  finally reaching a turning point? After a year of trying to do it on my own, have I made it to the place where I finally realize that I can never do this job without Him? Insufficient, incapable, and inept; this is me. Thankfully, I am not alone. He is with me, and He is all-sufficient, more than capable, and totally competent.

I have learned this lesson before. Wasn't it ten years ago when I wrote the note I would find months later, hidden away in my closet? "This dying to self is no fun. Why can't somebody else die once in a while?" It was a lesson in letting go, and here I am learning the lesson all over again with someone different.

Perhaps God leaves us to ourselves, to struggle and fail, in order that we come to the end of ourselves. Maybe He doesn't want it to be easy. Could it be, like giving the old testament law to the Children of Israel, He has given me this job of taking care of Mom, to show me just how much I need Him, and just how much He loves me? I think perhaps that's true.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. 

Philippians 4:13

Friday

They came to visit.

Thoughts for Thursday

1. Feeding Mom regular meals may prove challenging, but sneaking butter into sandwiches and scrambled eggs is pretty simple.

2. After listening to one of the women at Ladies' Prayer on Tuesday, I decided that for all Mom's paraphernalia (glasses, hearing aides, hospital bed, and oxygen concentrator), I can be thankful she doesn't wear dentures.

3. Alex thinks Grandma makes a good playmate, especially if she will help him put his boots on or read him a story.

4. I am still in love with the morning sunshine that floods my living room around 7:30 am, even if I am fighting to keep my eyes open.


5. A morning shower is preferred over an evening shower.

 6. Little things like flowery, old tea cups can bring a smile to my face.

7. It has been a amazingly mild winter, and I am thankful for little to no snow to shovel or traipse through on my way to and from the car. There haven't been too many snowmen hanging around, but that's okay. Maybe we'll find them next year. (Or paint some more fence pieces.)

8. Some- times the picture I take totally by accident turns out to be one of my favorites. (How about those spider webs?)

9. I still love that framed print at the antique store. I still didn't buy it, (I'm not sure where I'd hang it...) but it still makes me happy when I see the photograph. Something about young love, I guess.

10. I am totally thrilled with the long sleeved knit nightgown I got from Land's End this past week. It's a little bigger than I'd anticipated, but oh, so comfy! Being cotton, it did shrink a little when I washed it, so it doesn't feel quite so huge now. Either that or I put on a few pounds overnight.

11. Thirteen thoughts would be nice, but I'm running out of ideas...

12. We ate leftovers from our freezer tonight; spicy green chile stew that Grandmanita made. It sure was good, and it made me miss her all over again.

13. Tomorrow Leta is bringing the kids over for a visit, the first since Christmas. I am so looking forward to wrapping my arms around their little selves, kissing their soft cheeks, and listening to them play. I need to whip up a batch of cookies, I think.