Dear Dad,I've been thinking about you a lot lately, wishing you were here to answer my questions and point me in the right direction. Sometimes I momentarily forget you are gone and I find myself wanting to tell you something or ask your advice.
Today is your birthday and so we find ourselves once again filled with memories. Even the happy ones can leave us feeling teary, with a lump in our throats. We know you are safe with Jesus and that is an incredible comfort in our sadness, but we still miss having you here with us. Our time flew by all too fast and sometimes I feel as though I hardly had a chance to say good bye.
Every once in a while when I am at the house, I pull out your old diaries and read several pages before tucking them back into their hiding place. I desperately want to take them home and read them cover to cover, but have thus far resisted the urge.
I still hear your voice in my mind, see your smile, and hear your laugh. I love listening to you sing and play your instruments and I am incredibly blessed that you made those tape recordings for us to treasure. Deep down I once again wish that I had learned to play the guitar or harmonica. We'll be visiting the nursing home tonight, trying to bring a bit of encouragement to those folks you held so dear. I find myself falling in love with them a little bit more each week.
We are doing our best to take care of Mom for you. Sometimes she is quiet and I'm not sure what to say to her, but yesterday we were visiting and I asked her about some of the stories she used to tell us, stories from when she was a child and stories from your days together. Her eyes brightened and we laughed as she remembered those days. She was happy and I found myself feeling relieved. I hope she might take the time to write down some of her memories for us. I think I might buy her a journal. I'm sure she misses you so much more than she ever lets on.
As we remember you today and celebrate your life here, you will be spending your first earth birthday in eternity, a new life. I can just imagine the party you might have with Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Art, Danny and all those gone before, and though I don't really think there are birthday parties in heaven, the thought did make me smile. Maybe I'll have to make you a cake (or would you prefer elderberry pie?).
I love you, Dad, and look forward to that day when we will meet again.
Love,
Martha
Aww..this was sweet! I wonder about the birthday parties. We'll probably celebrate the day we got there...so different than those grieving below. :) He's probably playing the most beautiful harmonica he's ever seen! Best wishes to you today and you remember him. I hope you find the directions you need in caring for the stuff down here for your mom, too.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Betsy. There is so much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to when we meet again someday. I know there will be a big party one day. I wonder what's on the menu?
ReplyDeleteso, you think you eat in heaven, if ya eat you know what follows, do we have bodies in heaven? or is it just our spirit cause our earthly bodies are here?
ReplyDeleteWell the Bible talks about the marriage supper of the Lamb and that sounds like a party to me. Judy, I don't pretend to know all the answers, but Jesus was raised with a body incorruptible so that is what I am looking forward to.
ReplyDeleteI know that my Redeemer lives,
and that in the end he will stand upon the earth.
And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God;
Job 19:25-26
Precious tribute to your dad, Martha.
ReplyDeleteI think you may have discovered the secret to getting Mom to talk. She may have been afraid to bring up the subject before. If she does have short term memory, she still remembers the yesterdays.
It is just like knowing you are dying soon, nobody wants to talk about it, but I think it is good to talk about it, joke about it and plan ahead together.
I've been thinking of you today, Joy. I hope you are enjoying some fresh air and sunshine.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I am sure your Dad's spirit knows...
ReplyDeleteYou made me cry....again. Great tribute to a wonderful dad! I couldn't write a letter like this without mopping the floor when I was done. How'd you do?
ReplyDeleteThis was so precious Martha. Reading about your daddy, brings so many memories of my dad who left us at 57.
ReplyDeleteMy mom remained a widow all those years...she said Howard was my one and only. I think the stories you mom shares is so good for her and you. BTW my dad's birthday was April 5th.
I love visiting rest homes and have done it for years. It's deep in my heart to do so.
Loving you today Martha, and so touched with this tribute to your dad.
What a beautiful post. I am so sorry for your loss. I found your blog through your sister. I lost my mom in September too, and I am still grieving each day. You father sounds like such an amazing man. I praise God that we will see both of our parents in heaven some day.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you,
Traci
Thank you for stopping by, Traci. I have been perusing your blog too (through Priscilla). Heaven grows sweeter with every passing day.
ReplyDelete