I was totally overwhelmed on Monday. It wasn't the small children playing in my living room, just an overall unsettled stress deep within. Sometimes I find myself wondering whether the room is spinning or just my mind, and then I realize it's all those loose ends that never stay tied. On Sunday afternoon I heard part of a message on the radio. The pastor was speaking of those times when we go to pray and all we can muster is "Oh, Lord..." He said that was okay and God hears the cry of our hearts and so my prayer was just that, "Oh, Lord."
I had been wondering if God was hearing my prayers anymore or if He would ever answer my cry. On Tuesday morning my friend Vinnie came to play. I felt a sense of relief wash over me when I laughed at him kissing the goldfish through the side of the bowl. It was just the beginning. There was a phone call from a mom who I had agreed to babysit for. She doesn't need me after all. A little more stress relieved. Another phone call told me that my grandkids would be here today rather than Wednesday and that left Wednesday free and clear aside from putting Emma on and off the bus. Relief. And my friend Heather came to visit too. It was a wonderfully dark and rainy morning, perfect for a little bit of cleaning and a visit with a friend. In the afternoon Hannah and I ran out to the bank and a quick stop at the store. We ended the day with a Scrabble game between James, Hannah, and me. I think I lost, but that's okay. Today the pressure is relieved and all I had to do was trust God to provide a way of escape.
I am a work in the hands of the Master Potter. I pray that His fingerprints are all over me as I walk through this life. This is my journey. Thank you, Jesus, for not giving up on me.
I am mom to seven beautiful grown ups and grandma to seven beautiful grandchildren, and tender of a shrinking "flower garden."