Friday, February 28, 2014

Counting

Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.


The house is quieter without the hum of Mom's oxygen machine. She left us for glory yesterday morning and it's really just starting to hit me. I was just starting to get the hang of how to answer her surprise questions. "Is someone coming to take me home tonight?" she had asked at supper on Monday. "No, you're staying here tonight," I'd told her, but something deep inside told me perhaps she wasn't talking about the little house on Mohawk Street. In the three years she's been here, she never talked about going home. After she was in bed that same night I heard her talking. "That's my Uncle Louie. He's a great guy." and then something about Uncle Tom. She's seeing loved ones already passed on, I thought. And on and on she talked into the night, things I couldn't decipher. I don't know who she was talking to, maybe Jesus.

And then we took her out to see the doctor on Wednesday and she couldn't figure out why we needed to do that. She seemed pretty good during the visit aside from our concerns and the slight rattle in her left lung. The trip wore her out and on the way home she sometimes made strange sounds or had a hard time talking, and once we were home she slept much (with her head on the table) and talked little. I thought I might have to help her into her pajamas, but she managed to do it herself. Ben heard her coughing in the morning but by the time I got up at 7 am she was quiet. I don't always look in on her, but yesterday morning I did.

She's with Dad now and yesterday is pretty much a blur. The roles have flipped and now I am the child once again. It's going to be harder than I anticipated.

18 comments:

  1. My deepest sympathy. I certainly know how you feel. May God bless you.
    Mildred

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  2. Replies
    1. Yes, me too. I never had a chance to pull that music out again. I was going to do it too.

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  3. My deepest sympathy also. I bet anything she was talking to Jesus in the previous days. My mother tried to get out of bed to go to him before she passed. It is comforting that your mom had such faith. Please though, Martha, know that you really blessed your mother, take comfort in that, she had such a warm home with you.

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    1. Yes, Della, I think she was. I think it more now than I did while it was happening. I can't imagine doing this without Jesus.
      Thank you for your kind words and prayers. One day soon you will find me in your driveway. Maybe we can go to the Purple Monkey.

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  4. I'm sorry for your loss. She was very lucky to have you as her daughter.

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  5. My Mom saw angels in her room, and at one point she was looking up at the ceiling and was seeing and talking to her parents who were both in heaven. She seemed to be between two worlds. She was transitioning. Both Gordon and I send our condolences to you, Martha. God bless you!

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    1. Transitioning, yes. And isn't the Lord good to give us that tiny glimpse of heaven's light?
      Thank you for your love and prayers.

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  6. Well, I certainly wasn't expecting this post! I'm so very sorry. Wish I could give you a hug! Keep us posted on what happens the next few days. Praying and thinking of you!

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    1. Thank you for the hug. I really do feel it all the way here. The weekend had been a blur but God had been there every step of the way. The days ahead will bring tears but tears are healing and God keep them in a bottle. Maybe we'll get them all back one day.

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  7. That's a very interesting way to look at it...hmmm. Something to think about. :)

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  8. Oh Martha....
    My heart is heavy for you and your family...
    Please let us know how you are doing.....
    I am in Kentucky this evening....
    I read this post around 5am, but had to absorb what had taken place.....
    Never expected to read this today, that's for sure ♥️
    Your friend
    Linda

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    1. I never expected to be posting about my mother's passing so soon. I'm still absorbing these days later.
      Thank you for being a friend.

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  9. This makes me cry. Even though it’s been a few years.

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