Magically Delicious

I am beginning the grand, new adventure of quitting Zyrtec and let me tell you, this is going to be agonizing. Not only do I have seasonal allergies, but I deal with terrible itching, which is why I have taken antihistamines long term. Every time I forget a day, I begin to experience intense itching. I could scratch myself raw. I have been 

known, in the past, to wake up vigorously scratching my feet, ankles or legs. I've had lines and patches of hives left from my fingernails. Just rubbing up against something can get the itching started, something as simple as removing a piece of clothing. 

Last week I discovered that intense itching is a symptom of withdrawal. I was itching because I was taking the medicine! Oh, boy... It's been two days and it could be three weeks. I tried tapering off the medication a bit last week but even so I am driving myself crazy with the scratching and there is not a part of my being that can't join in the party. (I took a Benadryl this evening in the hope that I'll be able to sleep.)

In other news, better news, my people and I took a trip back to Mendon Ponds this afternoon. Number Nine had several little birds take a seed from his hand and was thoroughly delighted!

 I love watching to look the of wonder and sheer delight come over the faces of my kids and grandchildren when a chickadee lands on their finger. Even Killian found it amusing.

I had needed a walk in the woods and this outing was absolutely perfect.

A Little Bit of This Week

 I'm growing and learning every day. Growing can be painful. As much as I don't like pain, it is an incredible motivator.

I woke up 45 minutes late this morning and had no time for my daily shower. I washed as quickly as I could and ran out the door without shampooing my hair. I had two appointments after work with no time to come home in between, or so I thought. My duties were over 15 minutes early, giving me just enough time to run home and wash my hair before heading out.

Chiropractor. He gives me my weekly hug along with a spinal adjustment. Today I asked him if feet make the back hurt or the back makes the feet hurt. My ankles have been bothering me since I came home from the beach... He asked a few questions, scoffed at my flip flops, and gave me a card for a pedorthist. "You won't call. I can tell," he said. Pish! I don't like sore feet. Maybe I'll call them tomorrow.

Therapist. It was a good talk. He asks hard questions and makes me think. He suggests doing things that go against what I naturally tend to do. He helps me look inside to see where my thoughts need to change. He encourages me to let others own their own feelings, and not to take on what isn't mine to carry. This is hard because I naturally carry the hurts, emotions, and responses of others. It doesn't mean I should lose all empathy, but it does mean I need to let go of what isn't mine. Things I learned in CoDA.

On Monday evening I found myself home alone. The lake has been stinky with the yearly die-off of small fish, and so I decided to take my camera and go to another place I love. I headed for the woods. It was a lovely evening, the smell of honeysuckle heavy in the air. I walked a familiar trail and took pictures as I went. Along the way a few bikes passed, and a man and woman walked together. I was not completely alone. My prize photo opportunity was a Pileated Woodpecker finding dinner in a downed log. It was quite fabulous!

Where Have I Been?

Regular blogging takes a kind of concentration that is almost absent most days, but I'm still here. By the time I come upstairs at night, my mind and body are tired and my thoughts jumbled, as they are tonight. I've been feeling a little "off" lately, but today was some better. I'm not entirely sure what threw me off kilter, but I think I'm gradually getting to centered again.

Speaking of being centered, my pottery class was this evening. Night 6 of 8. Two more and the class is over. I have no new photographs to share. I've felt a bit out of my element this time around but tonight was a tad better. I actually pulled a decent sized cylinder, even if it did eventually collapse. I'd been feeling pretty discouraged with pottery so this is a ray of hope.

Sunday afternoon found me taking a long drive to a picnic at the home of my cousin Deb. There was a little bit of a celebration in honor of Aunt Mary and Uncle Chuck's birthdays and wedding anniversary. Looking back in the "Blog Files" leads me to conclude this was number 62. Aunt Mary is struggling and I am sad to see her looking so different from how she will always be remembered, always smiling and full of life. These are my only remaining aunt and uncle. Everyone else if gone...

I took my camera along to the party, left it in my car, went back out to get it, and then put it back again. I just didn't feel at ease snapping pictures of family members who hardly know me and didn't want to make uncomfortable those who do. So much has changed since the old gatherings... (Perhaps this is part of why I am feeling off. My heart hurts just writing this.) Anyway, a pair of robins had built their nest under the eave of the house and on top of a downspout. The momma and poppa birds were tag-teaming the feeding of their little family. Needless to say I went back for my camera.

Bits on the Beach and a Bird in a Bush

 I had a bit of time yesterday afternoon to run off to the lake. I sat on the pebble beach and combed through the stones in search of beach glass. The mouth of the creek gurgled as it poured into the lake where the north wind stirred up gentle waves and attempted to push the water back again. 

I picked tiny bits of white, brown, and green glass from the beach while also attempting to keep my jean jacket wrapped around me. I usually dress in layers, and had intended to bring a heavier jacket along "just in case" but had managed to leave the house without it.
 

I'd been picking glass for a time when I looked up and noticed a few bright, orange objects along the water's edge. Goldfish crackers? I glanced to my left and all along the edge of the beach toward the rocks that just out around the mouth of the creek, was a line of goldfish crackers. They were floating in on the waves and beaching themselves on the shore. 

I'd already been at the park for an hour or more, and collected  a fair amount of glass, when the cold wind off the lake drove me to my car. I decided to go home, but when I reached to top of the parking lot entrance, a bright yellow forsythia bush caught my attention. I rolled down my window for a picture, and that's when I saw the cardinal. I snapped several pictures and was ready to pull out just as my friend Gail was pulling in. Of course, I had to turn around and go back for a while. By the time I got home an hour later, I was pretty much frozen. Ha ha!

It's been a stressful few days and I wish I'd been in a better mindset last evening when a few family members were here. Most evenings I can tolerate, and even enjoy, the noise and activity of the kids, but I struggled with it yesterday and went to up bed later feeling "icky" inside. I am so thankful that God always knows when I am in desperate need of a friend. A phone call from someone who cares can make all the difference in the world.

Bits and Pieces

It's late and I have to get up early again tomorrow, but it's been a week since I've posted anything so here I am.

* After not spending any time at the pottery studio for several weeks, I have now been thrice in less than one. I met a friend there on Friday evening and spent 3 hours playing with the clay I'd wedged up two weeks ago. I'm sculpting figures again. On Monday I stopped quick to uncover my work so it could dry completely, and tonight I made a return trip to play in the mud some more. My friend Myung was there again, and some other familiar faces as well. It was nice to see my friend Ginger who I haven't seen there in a very long time. In January I start a new hand building class and will make some more friends.

* I was slightly under the weather this past weekend, and after meeting my friend Laura for breakfast after church on Sunday morning, I went home to take a nap. I slept a whole 2 1/2 hours and then went to bed early to boot. I was asleep well before Idris. And then I beat him into bed again on Monday night. By Tuesday morning I was feeling all rested and well again.

*  I finished reading a book on Friday night. It took me a couple of weeks, but I can finally say I read the book I bought over a year ago and left on my shelf. It was just too much information to absorb at the time. The Body Keeps the Score is not an especially easy read, but it is full of fascinating information. I'm still digesting much of it, and starting a new book as well. Going with something different this time, but yet another book I purchased and left (mostly) unread. Desiring God by John Piper was recommended by a friend years ago. Perhaps my concentration has been off for that long...? Anyway, I am making a valiant attempt to use some of my downtime at work in a more constructive manner. While babies sleep, if they sleep, and all sleep at once, I read.

* Hannah and I took Idris down to the bay to feed the birds just before dark on Saturday evening. No bread, just a bag of canned corn. The seagulls were happy with our offering and the child was thrilled to feed the birds. I was happy to take pictures of my grandson and his mom doing what I used to do with my kids not so very long ago.

* The past couple weeks have been emotional. The book I read was difficult in ways I wasn't expecting. Although I am in a healthier spot emotionally than I was a few years back, I can still find the wind knocked out of me every once in a while. Sometimes the drive to work is teary as I continue to work through hard stuff and as I watch my family work through hard stuff as well.

* Thanksgiving is almost here. Bethany is hosting as well as Sabrina. I will be taking pumpkin pies to Beth's house and eating dinner there, and making a visit to Nate and Sabrina later in the evening. I am looking forward to the long weekend off work. Four day weekends are unheard of at the daycare, unless it's Thanksgiving, which makes Thanksgiving a little like Christmas!

Things With Wings

Yesterday morning found me up and ready to face the world a little earlier than normal. We dropped my vehicle off to have her "shoes" changed and hopped across the street for a quick breakfast at the Original Candy Kitchen.

When we returned home it was bright and sunny, the kind of day that calls me outside and tells me to bring my camera, so I packed my lunch for work and went out to see what I could fnd.

I met a beautiful flock of murmurating starlings just over the hill.

Actually, they were mostly congregated along the road, but I know that murmuration is their intent. Incredible! And yes, it always reminds me a little bit of Alfred Hitchcock's movie "The Birds."

I drove along Lake Road and stopped to look out over Lake Ontario at the Ontario boat launch by Bear Creek. The lake was looking cold and green.

And since I had plenty of time and nowhere to go but work, I decided to see what was happening down by Irondequoit Bay and the outlet to Lake Ontario.

On a thin layer of ice along the shoreline of the bay a flock of seagulls was gather. their feet slipped as they walked across the slippery surface.

I tossed them a few stale Triscuits to fight and scramble over, and snapped pictures hoping for something wonderful.

I arrived at work 20 minutes early, but satisfied with having taken in a bit of sunshine and winter beauty. It was an "interesting" day at work. "Help me! Help me! Help me!" And all I can to is try in vain to assuage her anxiety.

The Grand(kid) Adventure

Yesterday was wildly successful!

We didn't go on many field trips this summer, but after pending the lovely days of Tuesday and Wednesday cooped up inside the nursing home with my friend, I knew I couldn't spend another gorgeous summer-like day inside. We had to go out and I knew just where. The Birdsong Trail at Mendon Ponds Park! I filled seven ziplock bags with sunflower seeds and we set off on a Grand(kid) Adventure. Uncle Joe came along and we met Aunt Bethany on the way.

There is nothing in all the world quite like the tiny claws of a small song bird clutching one's finger, except perhaps the first moment they fly directly toward one's face en route to the fingertips.

I am incredibly blessed each and every time I am able to share this experience with someone I love and I was not disappointed yesterday. These kids are hooked!

I'd originally intended to walk the trail, but after two hours we'd barely stepped out on the trail. If walking isn't your thing, the birds don't mind meeting you at the starting point. (This is Bethany.)

One of our nature lovers... Grandchild Number Two. I had no doubt this child would be enthralled and I was right.

I was unsure how Simon would respond. I knew he would love the adventure of being in the woods, but I wasn't certain if he would be patient and quiet enough to entice a bird into his hand, but the birds were very cooperative yesterday and he caught the "bug" too. He was just as pleased to have a bird land on his fingers as his brother and sister.





And then I have a nature lover of my own. Bugs, birds, and history. Joe could have stayed all day and we almost did. We arrived at noon and didn't go home until 3:30 pm.

It was so much fun and so satisfying that I'm almost ready for winter. But not quite.

Birds Outside My Window

I remembered to set out some seeds for the furred and feathered friends this week and was rewarded with some very nice cardinal opportunities along with a few of his friends. The sun was in just the right spot to catch the brilliance of his plumage against the yellow of the bare willow branches and blue sky.

Mr. Blue jay was out too, gazing at me from the maple tree. He always has such a suspicious look in his eye like he thinks I'm up to some kind of shady trick.

Just as I was about to click another frame, he pulled a trick of his own and dove off the branch and out of the tree. Lucky for me I caught him on the way down. (Clipped him out of the corner of my photo.) I think it's a pretty cool capture even if he was trying to get away.

 The robins have had a struggle this week. There are tons of them and they gather along the sides of the road, perhaps for a drink or the possibility of a frozen worm making it's way out into the sunshine. The are startled into fight as cars and trucks drive by and fly so low that it's a wonder there aren't more of them bruised and broken in the middle of the road.

From the Land of Ice and Snow

While our friend Tom has been in Hawaii, we have been having winter in upstate NY. I hope he is not too terribly disappointed to find a land of ice and snow on his return home. I have been doing my best to follow his advice and take my camera with me wherever I go. I had it along on my way to work Wednesday morning when a red light made this photo possible. I'd stopped at Lowe's along the way and found these snow laden trees and traffic signs on Five Mile Line over Rt 104 interesting. Thankfully, unlike the commuters on Tuesday morning, I found crossing the Bay Bridge rather uneventful.

The truth is, everything about the snowy weather on Wednesday was interesting. This week's snow took me back in time to the days of pulling on extra socks, piling on the layers, and putting on two pairs of mittens. We could hardly move when we to traipsed out into the winter wonderland. Trees laden with snow, banks as high as our heads, and snow up past our knees. We played follow the leader, walked the frozen creek, and hid beneath the lower branches of evergreen trees. We went out without parents, stayed out too long, and came home to thaw our red and itchy toes and fingers in cold water. I wanted to be a little girl again. I wanted to find a friend and hike off through the snow and into the woods. Of course, that didn't happen. I had to work and most of my friends aren't much into playing in the snow.

Yesterday the sun was bright, and my furred and feather friends came out to play. I stayed in and pointed my camera out the window. Please forgive the plethora of pictures.

The Naughties ate sporting bells on their collars once again, this time attached by little wire rings. They managed to remove the bells when attached with anything else. Hopefully they will keep the collars on and my bird and squirrel populations will stay safe.